I might be off these medications by June.
Or if I destabilize again, it could mean that I need these medications for life…
Either we retain my antipsychotic or my mood stabilizer.
Crossroads December 29, 2007
My heart is a busy thoroughfare.
A battleground for wars.
A teardrop on your cheek.
Dismantle (Repair) December 21, 2007
One last glance from a taxi cab
Images scar my mind
Four weeks’ve felt like years
Since your full attention was all mine
The night was young and so were we
Talked about life, God, death, and your family
Didn’t want any promises,
Just my undivided honesty, and you said
Oh oh, things are gonna change now for the better
Oh oh, things are gonna change, oh, they’re gonna change
I am the patron saint of lost causes
A fraction of who I once believed (change)
only a matter of time
Opinions I would try and rewrite
If life had background music playing your song
I’ve got to be honest, I tried to escape you
But the orchestra plays on, and they sang
Oh oh, things are gonna change now for the better
Oh oh, things are gonna change
[Chorus 2x]
Hands, like secrets, are the hardest thing to keep from you
Lines and phrases, like knives, your words can cut me through
Dismantle me down (repair)
You dismantle me
You dismantle me
Give me time to prove
Prove I want the rest of yours (prelude)
Call this a prelude to a lifetime of you
It’s not that I hang on every word
I hang myself on what you repeat
It’s not that I keep hanging on
I’m never letting go
[Chorus 2x]
Hands, like secrets, are the hardest thing to keep from you
Lines and phrases, like knives, your words can cut me through
Dismantle me down (repair)
You dismantle me
You dismantle me
Save me from myself
Save me from myself
Help me save me from myself
Save me from myself
Oh oh, things are gonna change now for the better
Oh oh, things are gonna change
[Chorus 4x]
Hands, like secrets, are the hardest thing to keep from you
Lines and phrases, like knives, your words can cut me through
Dismantle me down (repair)
You dismantle me
You dismantle me
But… December 20, 2007
In the middle of everything, a breaking point rises through.
A glimmering light that I dread.
A salvation that damns me.
My head is swimming with these thoughts and my predicament traps me deep inside.
I can’t run. I can’t escape. And I don’t want to.
I’m burning away.
Migraine Girl December 13, 2007
I’ve got a huge migraine tonight.
—
Paper ships sailing on placid waters.
Folding into themselves as if:
it were the last day.
Relax December 7, 2007
After 4 exams, I’m ready to crawl into my bed and hibernate.
Seriously.
I see you everywhere, anywhere, anytime.
I’ve been reading about the Paleolithic diet lately. Very very interesting to note that while man has used fire and cultivated plants, we have not yet evolved to eat them. (Huh? Yes.) Your body simply cannot handle the carbohydrates that you put into it.
I think what I’m driving at is a complete revolution for my way of life.
Check it out: http://www.second-opinions.co.uk/low-carb_index.html
Numb December 3, 2007
I don’t give a fuck anymore. All I care about is how to get myself out of this body as soon as possible.
—
I’m glad to see you’re happy. I’m happy for you. I really am. It gave me a warm glow seeing your pictures together. Instead of jealousy, I felt peace. Instead of hate, I felt warmth. I just wonder why you never posted our pictures like that when we were together. But that’s all over now. I’m probably too ugly anyway.
Enjoy the rest of your life.
